A good place to start would be the beginning: Having a clear vision of The Potter, or at least having an understanding of the Potter and His ways.
A lot of very good theologians and folks who study the Bible talk about the relationship of it all. The relationship with Christ that is the freedom, and the grace, and the love that fills the hole we can’t seem to fill elsewhere. The expectation that the relationship is the same for all people is ludicrous.
I have some really good friends. Lots of them have families and I get to be a part of that family, even though I’m not a part of that genetic family. This is great because not only do I get to take joy in my “other” families, but I get to know my friend better, too. I get to see these specific sides of him. How is my friend a father and what does that say about him specifically? About our relationship?
As an aspect of my parade, I view the Potter in a very similar light. I hope to interface with the other people in His family, genetic or otherwise. I want to learn how God is father to them, if only because that tells me more how Christ is a friend to me.
In a recent discussion I had, we were discussing where judgement fits into the Church. I was explaining how I see it, that all shades of grey look equally ugly next to His perfect white and that I find it almost impossible to call on someone’s sin in a loving manor. This came with much pushback, as others quoted Paul saying it is our responsibility to judge others (the context applied in this case). With tears, this person spoke of how much it hurt because he had casted out his friend, and can no longer be friends with that person. He felt God was telling him he could no longer be friends with this person, who meant a lot to him.
I found myself not wanting to learn this aspect of this person’s relationship with God, or simply refusing to believe that was the way Christ would have handled the situation. I simply do not believe, or want to believe, that pure love includes the pain, and hurt, that comes from losing a friendship. I feel like God is asking me to start pushing at my own beliefs and see what holds up.